Life Goal #3 – Replace Jon Stewart on The Daily Show


This post is the third installment in a series on my evolving vision to impact the world in  a positive way within my lifetime…or beyond.

[Mood rating: semi-sarcastic attempt at humor]

New Career Direction

Recently there has been a fair amount of press about Jon Stewart’s announcement that he will be leaving The Daily Show (on Comedy Central) later this year. While this is a disappointment for me, as well as many others, there may be a silver lining in this event;  this could be a huge opportunity for the person who will replace Jon on the show.

(See this article for conjecture about possible replacements: “Who Will Replace Jon Stewart On ‘The Daily Show’?“)

Now these are all reasonable suggestions, but there is another option that I would like to personally offer to the show’s producers. In the egalitarian spirit that Jon has epitomized, perhaps the next host should be an unknown from among the struggling masses. In fact, I think that I might be that very candidate!

Now, before dismissing this idea out of hand, let me offer some reasons why I might be that perfect candidate.

  • I am currently available – there are no current obligations that would prevent me from immediately stepping into the position.
  • I happen to share Jon’s style of wit and sense of humor.  If I do say so myself (since no one else is likely to be so bold on my behalf), I can pull off a pretty fair imitation of Jon already.  With a little coaching from the man himself, I’m sure that I can become a spot on replacement fairly quickly.
  • I would even be willing to dye my hair to look more like Jon, just to ease the transition for the show’s viewers.
  • As a recently reformed former conservative, I still have the evangelical zeal to really put my heart into lampooning my own errant past and those who still hold similar views.
  • Since I like to think of myself as being somewhat rational, reasonable, and analytical (as well as sarcastic), my insightful commentary on current events and political absurdity would carry on the noble tradition of The Daily Show.
  • I truly want to do something worthwhile that contributes significant value to society, just like politicians, bankers, capitalists, and war-mongering military industrialists.

Of course, in the interest of transparency, I should probably offer a few disclaimers and caveats…

  • I have never actually had a formal job in the broadcast media on a radio or TV show, but I am definitely thinking about starting my own YouTube channel very soon, so I think that should count for media experience.
  • Temperamentally, I lean toward introversion, yet I do enjoy being the center of attention at times. Plus, I can act far more outgoing than I naturally am, so this should not be a deal-killer, especially since many performers fit that description as well.
  • I don’t have a completely squeaky clean life record, but to discourage investigation into my past, I can always adopt a stage name (like many performers) and lie about my history (like politicians and conservative talk show hosts). On the positive side, should my  background be found out, having a non-angelic “history” might make my public persona more sympathetic and approachable. This would be a good thing, especially since I tend to come across as an arrogant prick (just like most politicians, powerful elites, and rich people).

Wait, I just realized something as I was writing this!  If I don’t get the Daily Show gig, there are others things I might be well suited to do with my life – I could be a politician, a powerful elite, or a snobby rich person!

Wow, I think I have just discovered my new Life Goal!

Stay tuned for Part 4 of this series…

[Note  – to casual readers, those who barely know me, and those who may be shocked by this because they assume that I am being serious (since much of my writing is): this post is intended to be satirical!!!]

[Update April 12, 2015 – Well this is now off the list since the job has already been taken.  But there is always next time!]


About Hoosedwhut

Engineer - by education, training, and career experience. Philosopher - by inclination and choice. Amateur psychologist - by instinct and necessity. Amateur theologian - by birth into two distinct worlds...
This entry was posted in Humor(ish), Life Goals, Politics and Social Issues and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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